depressed

just went out with my gfs...py and hildya~we had a great time talking,chilling out...too bad xuan wasn't here...touched on the usual stuff tt girls talk about when they get together...talking about who will get married first...how do ppl fall in love (coz my good friend is still single till now...need to try ways to make her fall in love haha!)...talk about studies...talk about the past, the present and the unknown future...

what the future lies ahead...interesting topic!the one thing tt everyone is working so hard in life for...to mould their lives in the coming years~whereas here i am...laying back,not the least worried tt i'm placed on academic probation 2,not the least prepared for what's coming in the years....sometimes i just dun understand how can i get past with life like tt...so bad!so unhealthy!so worrying!!!all of them are worried for me...but here i am feeling nothing much as though it's just like any other day...sighs!!!SIGHS!!!

is it really so good to be happy-go-lucky and easily contented with the way things are?

good - no problem being happy all day long...optimistic with life..nothing pulls u back

not good - no sense of achievement as u are contented with the simplest things...no expectations to meet...no goals in life

bleahh...tt's how things are!!!booo!!!the girls were all saying..."i think u will be the first to get married since u are not aiming to be a career woman kinda person..." haha true...might happen or might not... i'm not even attached now & perhaps will not be in the coming mths or yrs to come lol!hard to say yea?!but how to foresee myself in a wedding gown in 5 yrs' time...lol!not tt tough i guess...but where to find tt guy tt truly belongs to me?!

VERY DIFFICULT!!!

can i custom-make an ideal guy for me?!lol!!!hahaha!business idea eh...?!it's mine ah... *chop* copyright @ 2005 lol!crap...perhaps one day when technology is so advanced tt u can really do tt lol!!!okie come lemme see what i want in a guy haha!

criteria no.1 : must be taller and bigger size than me

criteria no.2 : must be decent (all the more better if he looks decent haha! i have a lust for them *purr*)

criteria no.3 : must be able to make me smile (not difficult coz i'm easily touched haha!)

criteria no.4 : must have the drive to achieve and provide a good life for the family

criteria no.5 : must be a family person

criteria no.6 : must gimme the freedom to go out with my friends but yet not to the extent of not caring for me

criteria no.7 : must know how to get jealous (but not too much coz tt would mean he's oversensitive)

criteria no.8 : must be generous (narrow-minded guys are NOT tolerated!!!)

criteria no.9 : must be sociable (i'm so noisy...so must be able to do so too esp with my family & friends)

criteria no.10 : if all above fail...just love me lots and lots!!!haha!

[P.S: the above is not in any order of preference]

HELLO!!!anyone out there who fits the bill?lol!please make ur way to my humble place and msg to book an appointment haha!how crappy!!!i'm so cranky~lol!just kidding anyway haha!!!but definitely i won't mind a friend who suits the above description haha!okie stop ur nonsense! *kionks*

okie i'm sober... *reflects* well i'm not some kinda superb gorgeous sexy lady...i'm just so common and i dun excel in anything...might be a jack of all trade but master of none...bleahh!!!what's more...no excellence in studies,in work,in almost any other stuff...other than bumming and more bumming...maybe master of sleeping?!!can tt be considered?!and lotsa talking but no action...just super-duper lazy bum...eeks!!!not good girl...wake up wake up!!!better get moving...achieve smth~do smth to be proud of...it's ur life!!!take control!!!

...as the author rants her frustration away, kindly choose to ignore whatever there is. just a load of nonsensical rubbish...