Someone take me for a ride...Away from all of this insanity

firstly, I applaud my dear moo moo for being so frank with her feelings and expressing herself in this so-called personal space ie suppose to be called our own. I admired you for that! I'm worried for you dear but I won't say much. So please whatever you do, please be happy all right?

now I'm in a nonsensical mood. I'm sorry my dear ye zi lao and my dear mr samandy for making you guys worried. I'll be fine I swear! Sorry ye za lao for spoiling ur evening out... sorry mr samandy for enduring the traumatizing period while I blog, wondering what's wrong with me.

upset, depressed, disappointed, sad, down, unhappy, whiney, PMS, moodiness, loneliness, unloved, emotional, confused, contradicting, oversensitive, stubborn, unreasonable, immature...
All of the above clump together, I present you the state I'm in now.

I have so much to say but I dunno how to and where to begin. It's just me, myself and I complexing things and making myself upset for god knows what reason.

I should be glad to be well-provided and not having to worry about my school fees. Whereas out there, there are people who have to be driven out to work at the tender age of 16 to earn a living for themselves. I know I am overdemanding and I fully understand the situation my parents have gone through to put me through so much. I really do appreciate what they have done... and I really love them a lot. But sometimes it disappoint me when we just can't seem to communicate. I am really so upset by tt. I hate the feeling of having to tell a lie coz when I tell em the truth, they get angry. Sometimes I feel like slapping myself for being so truthful...But I dun wish to lie. Why can't they accept it and be glad that I'm at some decent cafe and not some nightclubs drinking my fill till my liver explodes? I'm searching for this trust to be breach between us but it seems so hard to come by. And I'm on the verge of giving up. It really makes me feel so sad and at a loss of what to do.

my heart wrenches and aches. Tears sting my eyes whenever I think about it. I'll get over it...No worries. Parents are always parents. In their eyes, I'm always the child that never grows up despite the fact I'm hitting 21. The age of freedom? -sneers- BULLOCKS! It's not applicable in my case...

i'm so used to calling you my own
and now it's hard to let you go
i never thought it would be so
though i wish you were here to hold
my promise will prevail
i will not be here to stay
for now i see you have found
someone that you can call ur own
i wish you happiness til you grow old

to someone else, i dun need you to miss me dearly... i need you to talk to me dearie!!! but that will not happen...


on a lighter note, i have fallen in love with Mc'donald' chocolate milkshake with a touch of hawt HAWT fudge *slurps* heavenly! *winks*

P.S: told you i'll be fine mr samandy and uncle huat =)